TRYING TO ASSIGN A GAF SCORE
Transitions and Interludes
I’m in Florida, alone, with my grandmother. That should tell you many things about the state of my life at the present time. One might believe that in a long term relationship her partner may accompany partner on such a trip. If there is no partner or work makes it impossible, then the other may travel alone. In this case, I am not longer in a relationship. It ended in December. I’ll limit the details but it was incredibly shitty. I mean we had already really just been friends at that point due to many months of, “I really need to be sure before we make any long term decisions.”There was no “Benefits” to speak of other than the occasional hand hold or kiss on the forehead. This decision was made on our one year anniversary right after I caught him exchanging emails for casual encounters with women from craigslist. Anyway, I am not bashing. I will not hyperfocus on wrongs done. Just explaining facts that led to me being in Florida.
Another thing that should be explored is the fact I am even able to be here. I got myself a new job where I will be more respected (not counselor but therapist which is what I am and what my credentials indicate), make substantially more money, and have more vacation days. The only sucky thing is the drive but it is totally worth it. Therefore, I had a nice gap with time in between the jobs to have fun with. I figured why not get some palm trees and sunshine in my life, just as the second arctic vortex was about to descend onto my region?
I will be able to study for my NCE which is very important in my next step in my career. After I pass it, all I will need is 6 more months of supervised practice until I am able to get my license. The rest is paperwork. I am thrilled but terrified to take another huge exam. After failing my comps by less than half of a point which postponed a year of my life, it gives me severe anxiety to even think about sitting for the exam. I almost do not want to even tell anyone when I actually take it due to fear of failure. I am hoping that when I return from Florida I will take those days before my job and study until I believe I am solid and take it then. But, that may or may not be happening….so you don’t hold me to it…
I guess I will approach my life at the moment as a musician approaches an interlude. We know that with an interlude that the music will return, but enjoying a change in pace can be good and is makes the return to the theme or chorus all the more beautiful. I’m going to enjoy this break.